I did a DJ gig at a Christchurch pub not too long ago and with the exception of being hit on by two clueless guys, it went pretty well.
One of them kept complaining about the music I was playing but strangely enough, he stayed until closing time and danced to it.
His friend said I must have been hired for my looks and later, while staring at my chest, said my boobs looked very "poke-able."
I'm sure when you're several beers in that sort of comment seems awesome.
It isn't.
Nick was furious when I told him and asked why I didn't tell both of them where they could stick themselves.
I guess it's that old habit I have of trying to be nice to someone until they make it impossible to continue.
I was getting to that point but then the pub closed.
On New Year's Eve I went back again.
I completely failed to read the crowd and play the right sort of music until the very end.
I should have known that a room full of the olds would prefer rock and roll to the more dancey stuff I was playing.
What did I learn from this? Calvin Harris does not cure all ills.
Finally, hoi polloi elected one of their number to approach me and gently suggest that I play some AC/DC.
Like a true Kiwi, the representative appeared to struggle under the burden of having to express discontent and possibly hurt my feelings.
He looked incredibly relieved when I nodded at the feedback and told him I would cue up his suggested songs. He shook my hand and thanked me.
Things got a lot better after that. People came out to dance.
I was even able to get over my fear of using a microphone for long enough to do the New Year's countdown and cue up a peppy version of Auld Lang Syne.
The last hour was a lot of fun and I was only sorry that Nick wasn't there to give me a smooch.
He had decided to stay home because, in his words, he didn't want to have to fight anyone who might feel the need to comment on my boobs. As it turned out, there was no need to worry. I was left alone.
Pubs can be a great place to DJ because you get to know the regulars and the kind of music they like so you can keep them happy.
That's what I want most when I'm at the mixer.
One of them kept complaining about the music I was playing but strangely enough, he stayed until closing time and danced to it.
His friend said I must have been hired for my looks and later, while staring at my chest, said my boobs looked very "poke-able."
I'm sure when you're several beers in that sort of comment seems awesome.
It isn't.
Nick was furious when I told him and asked why I didn't tell both of them where they could stick themselves.
I guess it's that old habit I have of trying to be nice to someone until they make it impossible to continue.
I was getting to that point but then the pub closed.
On New Year's Eve I went back again.
I completely failed to read the crowd and play the right sort of music until the very end.
I should have known that a room full of the olds would prefer rock and roll to the more dancey stuff I was playing.
What did I learn from this? Calvin Harris does not cure all ills.
Finally, hoi polloi elected one of their number to approach me and gently suggest that I play some AC/DC.
Like a true Kiwi, the representative appeared to struggle under the burden of having to express discontent and possibly hurt my feelings.
He looked incredibly relieved when I nodded at the feedback and told him I would cue up his suggested songs. He shook my hand and thanked me.
Things got a lot better after that. People came out to dance.
I was even able to get over my fear of using a microphone for long enough to do the New Year's countdown and cue up a peppy version of Auld Lang Syne.
The last hour was a lot of fun and I was only sorry that Nick wasn't there to give me a smooch.
He had decided to stay home because, in his words, he didn't want to have to fight anyone who might feel the need to comment on my boobs. As it turned out, there was no need to worry. I was left alone.
Pubs can be a great place to DJ because you get to know the regulars and the kind of music they like so you can keep them happy.
That's what I want most when I'm at the mixer.
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