The Apple Watch: New Ways To Ignore What Really Matters

Apple.

A company pulled out of obscurity by a raging asshole with a vision. 

They gave us a replacement for the Walkman and made sure it had enough faults so we would feel compelled to by a new one every few years. (Screw you guys! I still got my 2008 pod and it works fine. Mostly.)

Then came the iphone and the apps. Ignoring those around us had become that much cooler.

Did you ever want to grow fake veggies on a fake farm? Did you ever wonder, at any given moment, who in your immediate area was taking a poo? 

Apple gave you the platform. All you needed was the personal dedication to not do important things with your life.

Now there's the Apple Watch. 

According to a recent ad I saw on television, it's possible to play a song on the piano, be updated by your watch that you've been outbid on an item, dismiss the notice, and not break the pace of your playing because you came to the spot in the song where you could play with one hand. 

See, that item you are bidding on is important. Essential. You need it. You deserve it. Art and music should never get in that way of you getting what you were born to have. 

Apple made that possible.

In another ad a nerdy young man is about to kiss a cute-as-a-button girl. They lean in and grin but, uh oh! Her watch buzzes to alert her about a car she was thinking of buying. The boy pauses awkwardly and the girl dismisses the notice with a sheepish smirk. They continue with their smooch. 

In what should have been one of the most tender and passionate moments between two people who are mutually attracted to one another Apple was there to get in the way. 

And the guy is cool with it. He's okay with always having to come second to social media updates. Hell, maybe he'll even do the same to her. When they get tired of each other they can text each other a break up message whilst standing inches apart. 

Maybe if the watch was telling the girl her aunt was taken to the hospital or that a new kidney had just become available for her that would be understandable but a frickin' car? Really?

What these ads tell me is that humans are little better than cats chasing a laser pointer dot. 

We are slaves to any little distraction no matter how meaningless.

After reading Dave Eggers' Silicon Valley piss-take  "The Circle" I'm a little concerned when I see ads like these.

Another ad here in New Zealand shows a guy sitting at the table with family members during the holidays and staring at his phone. 

The ad says says that thanks to Neon TV On Demand he doesn't have to listen to his granddad tell his favorite story anymore.

Isn't that wonderful news! 

The old guy you only see a few times a year who loves you very much can now be blocked out by your phone!

Old people suck! Watch those Poldark episodes!

I have an appreciation for some tech. I like my laptop that I'm typing on write now and that Blogger allows me to "dear dairy" the world.

But I'm typing this during my family's designated nap time. 

Alex is asleep, the NPR is doing teen things that I don't want to know about, Nick is in Auckland with his boys and I am having a quiet moment of reflection. 

If something important was going on I wouldn't want some dumb machine getting in the way. 

I wish I could warn the young folks about these things but all they'd likely hear is "these kids today/get off my lawn/uphill to school both ways."

Sigh.

It Takes A Village To Manage A Womb

Why, in two thousand mother-flippin' fifteen, are we still giving women grief when it comes to decisions about children?

Recently, a woman named Holly Brockwell garnered international attention after she made it known that she didn't want children.

The negative fallout saw total strangers calling her "selfish" and writing nasty things on her Twitter feed.

A New Zealand woman named Virginia Braun made a similar decision and had herself sterilized in her 30s.

"There's a deeply embedded idea that to be a woman is to be maternal," she said.

She's right.

Even in these modern times, there's a persistent assumption that all women have an inborn need to become nurturing mothers.

Fatherhood, on the other hand, is still pretty much a thing that some men dabble in when they aren't at work or watching the big game.

Braun says society does a great disservice to women when it questions their choices about children.

"Society" does not raise individual children so, in my view, it can keep it's damned opinions to itself.

It's no one's business what a woman does with her womb.

The human race is not in danger of dying out.

Motherhood isn't some state of grace.

It brings a flood of negative judgments about your every decision.

One child is not enough. Two or more is too many.

The teaching style, clothes and toys you select will always be wrong.

If you give a child formula you are poisoning them. If you feed them breast milk, you had better not let anyone see your boobies.

If you stay at home with your children you are a drain on the economy but if you go back to work you are abandoning them.

Dr Ana Gilling, a Victoria University teaching fellow writes,

"Suppose a child comes into the picture. Some may suggest men increasingly stay at home but the reality suggests otherwise. Say both parents are working full time. Imagine the child gets sick and needs to come home from school. A subtle gender norm would see that the woman is called to pick up the said child, for example. Household survey figures suggest male/female housework disparity occurs, irrespective of whether both parents work full time, where women going back to work have the same amount of housework... if men return, housework is said to drop by 20-50%."

So in addition to being under constant pressure to "mom the right way" women are also expected to manage the house and make whatever sacrifices are necessary to put the child first.

Until society puts more pressure on fathers to do their fair share, women will continue to suffer personal and professional setbacks.

Given these facts, is it really surprising that some women don't want children?

A Review Of The Part Of Carch 22 That I Read Until The Sexism Drove Me Away

I was just reading Joseph Heller's Catch 22 for the first time and I had to stop at chapter 13.

Having served in the U.S. Army I could appreciate the text dealing with arbitrary rules, abuse of authority and inability to fix problems due to a heavy military bureaucracy.

This authenticity isn't surprising since Heller served in the military during WWII.

What kept me from going further was the disgusting portrayal of every single female in the book.

Women only exist in Catch-22 to be lusted after and fucked.

While the men in Heller's book have names, personalities and backstories, women are only differentiated by their physical features or the type of sex they have.

One female character is merely referred to as "Nately's whore."

Women are put into Heller's book so his manly soldiers will have something to stick their penises in. Sometime they are allowed to cook meals and clean rooms but only while wearing lime green panties and still being sexually available.

I suppose it's possible that Heller went through life never meeting women who were capable of doing more than cooking meals and serving some sort of sexual gratification purpose, but I doubt it. So I'll put this down to willful misogyny.

There seems to be a certain type of male author who loves to write about manly men in masculine worlds who plow through women and are made godlike in the process.

 I wonder if they weren't all latent homosexuals who could never go the distance because being gay wasn't seen as manly enough?

If true, that's really unfortunate but it's still no excuse for making shallow, two dimensional sex bots out of all your female characters.

I'm sure if you had cornered Heller at a party and asked about this he would say he "adored women" and then go on to list the wonderful things about the "fairer sex" that he loved so much. Most of them would be self serving and more about how great they made him look or feel.

Blind worshipers of Heller like the gentlemen who wrote the introduction in my version of the book will easily look past or not mention this little hiccup in their idol's work.

A few of them may even trot out the ol' "product of his time" chestnut-as if there was an era in history when men didn't actually know that women were human beings.

I'm putting this guy in the same rubbish bin as super tit Jack Kerouac and Norman Mailer-the latter being an asshole who actually almost killed his wife by stabbing her and then had his family convince her not to press charges. 

Adele's Latest Self Indulgent Song

I know Adele is more popular than ever and people love her voice but are they really listening to some of the pathetic shit she says?

Let's have a look at the lyrics of her latest hit "Hello:"

Hello, it's me
I was wondering if after all these years you'd like to meet
To go over everything
They say that time's supposed to heal ya, but I ain't done much healing

Hello, can you hear me?
I'm in California dreaming about who we used to be
When we were younger and free
I've forgotten how it felt before the world fell at our feet

There's such a difference between us
And a million miles

Hello from the other side
I must've called a thousand times
To tell you I'm sorry for everything that I've done
But when I call you never seem to be home

Hello from the outside
At least I can say that I've tried
To tell you I'm sorry for breaking your heart
But it don't matter, it clearly doesn't tear you apart
Anymore

Hello, how are you?
It's so typical of me to talk about myself, I'm sorry
I hope that you're well
Did you ever make it out of that town where nothing ever happened?

It's no secret that the both of us
Are running out of time

Look sweets, it didn't work out and he's moved on. Just because you had a little fantasy about the "good times" doesn't mean he wants to get together a talk about it.

It's sort of ego porn for someone to go on and on about breaking someone's heart. 

If he's not answer the phone it's probably because he's scared shitless that you won't stop calling. There's probably a restraining order out against you right now.

"Running out of time" for what exactly? You still think he wants to have kids with you?

What Adele is really trying to say is, "I miss how good I felt being mean to you and wonder if you hate yourself enough to let me do it again?" 

I know she's got her fans and that the same people who buy crap songs like this one loved lyrics like, "Never mind I'll find someone like you, I wish nothing but the best for you too..." lyrics that, honestly speaking, make me want to sick up the last meal I ate.

Fighting Terror With Terror

I guess Europe and the US will never learn when it comes to the causes of terrorism.

Instead of pontificating about how it's all Islam's fault, or claiming that "they" just hate our freedom or digging your heels in when it comes to helping refugees, here are some tips that might just work:

Stop arming other countries and propping up their militaries

Stop acting like you have no responsibility for the thousands of refugees fleeing the countries that you armed and fortified.

Get some enlightenment about what Islam is and learn about the Koran. One of the first things you might notice is that, like Christianity, Islam is interpreted and practiced in many ways.

Stop persecuting people who want to express their faith by wearing a certain item of dress

Stop fobbing off large communities of ethnic groups into impoverished ghettos and thinking you can get away with forgetting about them

Start looking at the causes of poverty and discontent instead of using the ignorant reasoning that people are just "lazy" or "evil."

Stop using terror attacks in Europe and elsewhere to bomb the shit out of Syria. The recent attack was orchestrated by someone who was born and grew up in Belgium. The seeds of discontent were sown there.

Don't complain when your borders are crossed by even more terrified refugees from Syria who are now having to flee conflict coming from inside and outside their own country.

Things Get Ugly in Parliament

Australia has been having a great time lately paying Indonesian smugglers to turn away refugees from its shores and indulging in its usual mix of racism and conservative paranoia.

If people arrive in Australia seeking asylum they are likely sent to the festering hellpit known as Christmas Island to be mistreated and forgotten about.

A related issue has hit New Zealand and caused some ugly behavior from the Prime Minister and his supporters.

Australia has a lot of kiwis working and living there and putting their hard earned cash into its economy. While Aussies working in New Zealand are entitled to health care benefits, the same right is not given to kiwis in Australia. Australian citizenship is not easily attained. You can work your whole life in the country and build a family there and still only be a visitor whose stay is subject to onerous terms.

Recently, Australia has decided to get tough on non citizens who have committed any number of offenses and put them up for deportation.

This has included a number of kiwi non violent offenders who had minor convictions when they were younger and have since gone on to become productive members of Australian society.

The drag net recently picked up a former kiwi soldier who had served honorably and moved to Australia in 2012. He was put into solitary confinement for belonging to a motorcycle gang which is not an illegal offense in the area where he lives. He has not been charged with any criminal activity in relation to his membership.

It is examples like this that have cause many to criticize John Key and his supporters for not speaking out for the citizens of New Zealand who are being treated this way in Australia.

Instead of listening, processing and responding with a level head, the prime minister shot off his mouth in parliament saying that those criticizing him were "supporting rapists."

This lead a number of women MP to stand up parliament and try to speak about there personal experiences with sexual assault. The power to their microphones was cut off by the speaker of parliament and they were kicked out. Other women followed them out in protest.

The point they were trying to make was that John Key was being unreasonable and that they, as victims of sexual assault certainly did NOT stand with rapists.

Watching the women try to speak and get shut down was painful and rage inducing.

Asking the leader of your country to speak up for the rights of his citizens abroad is not tantamount to siding with rapists and murderers.

Key's words were shameful and he should apologize.

In the days following his outburst MRAs and a former female president of the National party, Michelle Boag, have come out to chastise the women for speaking out and act as if they were basking in their victimhood.

I'd like to think that I live in a progressive country where people (and especially people of my gender) are better than this but then idiots like Boag open their festering gobs and it gets a bit depressing.

No one who has been raped and had their power taken from them exults in their "victimhood."

If some people are too thick to understand why victims of sexual assault would be offended by the commentary of the PM then I feel sorry for them while still feeling they should sit down and STFU.

Maybe this latest incident will cause Key's party to lose votes and someone with the will to stand up to Australia will take over.

We can only wait and see.

A Good Birthday

Nick is an awesome gift giver.

For my recent birthday he gave me a fishing rod, moleskin notebook and pencils and a bird book.

He knows me well! I am now well equipped for my research trip out to Arthur's Pass in December.

He also gave the NPR some change so she would buy me something and I got a lovely candle from her.

Nice.

Good News Tuesday

I got my acceptance letter for the University of Canterbury School of Law today.

I am so excited!

I can just imagine myself, the greying elder student sitting in the front of the class with my notebook and number 2 pencil.

Woot!

Now I have to get some funding and balance my classroom and work schedules.

A Town Called Otira

Nick and I went to Arthur's Pass so I could finally complete the climb to the top of the Temple Basin track.

Just past the track is a small town called Otira. It was a booming hive of activity during the twenties when the rail tunnel was being built and the train station was in heavy use.

The entire town was purchased by a couple in 1998 for $80,000.00

Today the town consists of an historic hotel and a collection of cute cottages built during the boom days.

It had a school, heated swimming pool, tea rooms and post office once but they have all been closed or converted into something else.

There are about 80 residents (though where they all live is a mystery to me).

The town hasn't really been a destination spot for a while and it has a quietness that I love.

I guess most people know of Arthur's Pass with it's two cafes, reasonable accommodation and easy access to multiple walking tracks.

For me though, a quiet spot with cottages that back up to a national park forest and are available for short term rent is a dream come true.

The town is two hours from my house so it's accessible on weekends. It is the perfect place to establish a study base for the areas various kea populations.

Nick and I  popped into the hotel for lunch and I was fascinated by the antique decor.

There were some creative examples of taxidermy in there including two hairless rats that had been given bird wings. A stuffed possum was graced with a pair of horns and fangs.

There was a fire going and a brass bucket full of coals sat nearby.

There was a canary in a small cage by the window and an Australian Galah in a large cage opposite of it.

While I whispered to the larger bird, an old man in the corner told me the bird's name was Scottie and that he could talk.

This man was quite lively and had a twinkle in his eye.

He decided to get out of his seat at one point and it took him three tries to get up the momentum to stand.

"I'm as old as some of the things in here," he chuckled, nodding toward the ephemera of yesteryear.

As I whispered to Scottie he set his crown feathers up and asked how I was doing.

"His name is Scottie," a younger man said to me.

The older man hissed out an aggressive "Jesus Christ!" at him.

I guess when you grow up in a place you feel you've earned the right to tell the outsiders all the good stories.

How dare some young upstart swoop in a steal your glory! The cheek!

The younger man then proceeded to tell me everything the older one had just explained.

Nick and I were given a tour of the hotel. Several of the rooms held giant ornate wooden beds, including one Queen Elizabeth's father had used when he had visited the place back in 19-humdee hum. And they are still talking about it like it was yesterday.

I liked that town. I felt an immediate connection to it and looked forward to returning soon.

Recently, I contacted the family who own the town and they have agreed to rent one of their cottages to me after Christmas.

I can't wait to get down there with pens and notebooks and wander off into the woods to study kea.

The lady who runs the pub and hotel told me there are three keas that like to come to the window and stare at Scottie.

Maybe I won't have to venture far to meet my first study subjects.