Oh my, my, my.
What went right on Thursday night? Not much my friend, not much.
I got there around 11:30 so I could get a feel for what the other guys were playing. To my surprise the venue had a dance space. I was expecting to play slower ambient house or chill type background music. I quickly saw that that wouldn't do.
Before I play a set I will sit for hours at home looking for rare remixes and trying to match beats so when I cross fade from one deck to the other there won't be any weird cacophony.
I subscribe to a premium membership through the DJ software company so I can get unlimited downloads like 99-Style by Poka- which is damned near impossible to find anywhere else. I have it on Sound Cloud but the free downloads ran out ages ago and the program isn't set up for mixing.
Anyhoo, I wasn't expecting difficulties with the equipment but that's exactly what I got.
I suppose if you are going to fail as hard as I did, it helps to at least do it in front of friends-people who wish you well and will still speak to you when you see them in class on Monday.
Sigh.
I got all hooked up at about 1:45 a.m. and S helped me get situated. He and I are both still learning how to use the actual deck and spend the majority of our time using the software on our laptops for mixing.
When setting up we accidentally selected the option that only allows you to download one song at a time on one deck. When I tried to add a song to deck B, the song loaded over the one I was already playing on deck A. Awful!
Then the speakers went silent and we could hear the muffled music emanating quietly from some unknown origin. We spent the next few minutes looking all over and trying to find out what button we had hit to make the music go away. At this point A. came over and drunkenly asked if I would play some hip hop. He kept insisting and cajoling. I was panicking over the impending disaster and shooed him away.
The people on the dance floor started to get restless and clear out. We had to figure something out fast. I reset the deck options and S somehow figured out the problem with the speakers. Finally Poka came booming out over the speakers and people started to dance.
"I think we need more practice with this thing," S said, gesturing at the deck.
I agreed.
The song after Poka was slower and a few people left the floor. The song after was also slow and the rest of them cleared out.
The owner of the establishment came over and put his arm around me sympathetically. (Imagine a kinder, gentler, Asian Simon Cowell.) "Sweetheart, do you have any salsa?" he asked.
"I don't!" I wailed.
I called S over and he replaced my laptop with his own. The resulting silence sent the rest of the patrons home which wasn't too surprising since it was pretty near closing time anyway.
I felt so awful.
The kid who won our school DJ contest was there trying to get an idea about what to play at the Halloween party. I drove him home and we talked about the clubs he had gone to back in his native Japan. He said he needed some help compiling music for our party and I promised to help him out.
My friend Ser came over today and told me he thought more people would have voted for me if they had known how pronounce my DJ name.
I had tried to be all clever and chosen the Nahuatl word "Xochitl."
The guy who won was calling himself "DJ Atom."
I think Ser may have a point.
While Ser and I were driving around Fort Ord we discovered a roller rink and I noticed they have a need for a DJ.
I bet I'd have to play a lot of Justin Bieber for tween girls and that's just a step above painting one's face white and pretending to be trapped in an invisible box.
Anyway, here are some tips I've compiled for anyone trying to DJ in a U.S. club:
1. Always have an alcoholic beverage handy. Don't drink it just keep it there so you can blame it on the ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-alcohol if things start going south.
2. Have an easy-to-pronounce DJ name, especially if there is a competition and people will have to write it down to vote for you. (I'm thinking of changing mine to "DJ Hot Mess" or "DJ Technical Difficulties", that way I can say I warned my listeners.)
3. Remember that you are NOT in Europe and all those sweet remixes that would bring 'em to their knees at Club Pacha will probably not go over well with the Americans. Be prepared to play something hideous like that damned G-6 song or something with Chris Brown's punk ass in it. (I refuse to play Chris Brown but there are plenty of auto-tuned substitutes that are equally as awful.)
4. Don't get all "lost in the music" and start doing crazy dance moves around the equipment. You might fall on one of the deck buttons and mute your sound (like I did). It ruins your image of cool indifference if you're too into your own tracks. Head nodding, and some light stepping is okay.
5. Show up early and do a mic and sound check before everyone else gets there.
6. Do NOT hit the Sync button on the same side of the deck where the current song is playing unless you want it to sound like Alvin and Chipmunks just dropped a frantic dance track.
7. Only fiddle with the pitch buttons when you are confident that they won't spell out disaster on a cross fade. Practice at home.
8. Never wear long sleeves to an inside gig. No matter what the weather outside is like, inside is going to feel like a sauna.
I'll add more to the list as my experiences permit. For now though, this ought to be a good start.
Good luck and good night!
What went right on Thursday night? Not much my friend, not much.
I got there around 11:30 so I could get a feel for what the other guys were playing. To my surprise the venue had a dance space. I was expecting to play slower ambient house or chill type background music. I quickly saw that that wouldn't do.
Before I play a set I will sit for hours at home looking for rare remixes and trying to match beats so when I cross fade from one deck to the other there won't be any weird cacophony.
I subscribe to a premium membership through the DJ software company so I can get unlimited downloads like 99-Style by Poka- which is damned near impossible to find anywhere else. I have it on Sound Cloud but the free downloads ran out ages ago and the program isn't set up for mixing.
Anyhoo, I wasn't expecting difficulties with the equipment but that's exactly what I got.
I suppose if you are going to fail as hard as I did, it helps to at least do it in front of friends-people who wish you well and will still speak to you when you see them in class on Monday.
Sigh.
I got all hooked up at about 1:45 a.m. and S helped me get situated. He and I are both still learning how to use the actual deck and spend the majority of our time using the software on our laptops for mixing.
When setting up we accidentally selected the option that only allows you to download one song at a time on one deck. When I tried to add a song to deck B, the song loaded over the one I was already playing on deck A. Awful!
Then the speakers went silent and we could hear the muffled music emanating quietly from some unknown origin. We spent the next few minutes looking all over and trying to find out what button we had hit to make the music go away. At this point A. came over and drunkenly asked if I would play some hip hop. He kept insisting and cajoling. I was panicking over the impending disaster and shooed him away.
The people on the dance floor started to get restless and clear out. We had to figure something out fast. I reset the deck options and S somehow figured out the problem with the speakers. Finally Poka came booming out over the speakers and people started to dance.
"I think we need more practice with this thing," S said, gesturing at the deck.
I agreed.
The song after Poka was slower and a few people left the floor. The song after was also slow and the rest of them cleared out.
The owner of the establishment came over and put his arm around me sympathetically. (Imagine a kinder, gentler, Asian Simon Cowell.) "Sweetheart, do you have any salsa?" he asked.
"I don't!" I wailed.
I called S over and he replaced my laptop with his own. The resulting silence sent the rest of the patrons home which wasn't too surprising since it was pretty near closing time anyway.
I felt so awful.
The kid who won our school DJ contest was there trying to get an idea about what to play at the Halloween party. I drove him home and we talked about the clubs he had gone to back in his native Japan. He said he needed some help compiling music for our party and I promised to help him out.
My friend Ser came over today and told me he thought more people would have voted for me if they had known how pronounce my DJ name.
I had tried to be all clever and chosen the Nahuatl word "Xochitl."
The guy who won was calling himself "DJ Atom."
I think Ser may have a point.
While Ser and I were driving around Fort Ord we discovered a roller rink and I noticed they have a need for a DJ.
I bet I'd have to play a lot of Justin Bieber for tween girls and that's just a step above painting one's face white and pretending to be trapped in an invisible box.
Anyway, here are some tips I've compiled for anyone trying to DJ in a U.S. club:
1. Always have an alcoholic beverage handy. Don't drink it just keep it there so you can blame it on the ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-alcohol if things start going south.
2. Have an easy-to-pronounce DJ name, especially if there is a competition and people will have to write it down to vote for you. (I'm thinking of changing mine to "DJ Hot Mess" or "DJ Technical Difficulties", that way I can say I warned my listeners.)
3. Remember that you are NOT in Europe and all those sweet remixes that would bring 'em to their knees at Club Pacha will probably not go over well with the Americans. Be prepared to play something hideous like that damned G-6 song or something with Chris Brown's punk ass in it. (I refuse to play Chris Brown but there are plenty of auto-tuned substitutes that are equally as awful.)
4. Don't get all "lost in the music" and start doing crazy dance moves around the equipment. You might fall on one of the deck buttons and mute your sound (like I did). It ruins your image of cool indifference if you're too into your own tracks. Head nodding, and some light stepping is okay.
5. Show up early and do a mic and sound check before everyone else gets there.
6. Do NOT hit the Sync button on the same side of the deck where the current song is playing unless you want it to sound like Alvin and Chipmunks just dropped a frantic dance track.
7. Only fiddle with the pitch buttons when you are confident that they won't spell out disaster on a cross fade. Practice at home.
8. Never wear long sleeves to an inside gig. No matter what the weather outside is like, inside is going to feel like a sauna.
I'll add more to the list as my experiences permit. For now though, this ought to be a good start.
Good luck and good night!
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